Do Not Disturb
March 7, 2012 1 Comment
We have this:
The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. I Corinthians 7:4 KJV
What is a Christian couple to make of this verse in the context of Paul’s teaching about sexual intimacy in marriage?
As the preceding verse establishes that a husband or wife owes their mate to be sexually generous (due benevolence), verse 4 specifically defines that duty. Each spouse has delegated authority to sexually please their spouse’s body. We give (delegate) that authority to our mate upon marrying them.
Allow your husband or wife to sexually please you! How?
- Say what you want so you can get what you say. Psychic powers shouldn’t be a prerequisite for marrying you.
- Be willing to try new sexual activities. Your mate delights in delighting them. Don’t frustrate their efforts by responding with fear.
- If your mate proposes something that offends your faith, let them know. Explain how. Work with them to come up with an alternate activity.
- Take care of your body…which is their body! Eat right. Exercise. Difficulties with erection, vaginal lubrication, energy and overall libido are often a direct result of sedentary lifestyles and terrible diets.
- MAKE time to be with your spouse. If time is an issue, TAKE the time. If your schedules make it hard to make or take time for sex, STEAL time. Sexual intimacy is an essential part of the marriage experience.
- Lay off the mediums that destroy a healthy sense of sexuality. We’re not desperate housewives. We don’t need to have sex like porn stars. And stereotypical portrayals of male and female perspectives of sex needn’t apply to us. Don’t conform to society’s sexual norms. Transform to God’s. (Rom. 12:2)
- When being sexually intimate with your mate, be present! Physical presence is insufficient. Be present in every way…including mentally.
Bottomline: We must allow our mate to please us by not sabotaging their efforts by our lack of effort!