Piston, We Have A Problem!

I’ve gotta talk to my unit, my member, my penis…my piston.  I’ve gotta let him know some things.  I’ve gotta say to my little guy “Piston, we have a problem!

The conversation will probably go like this:

“Piston, we have a problem.  You’ve got to get up.  You’re just lying around and it’s embarrassing.  When Ladybird comes around, you’re supposed to get up.  You’re suppose to show you are interested.  You’re freaking my wife out!  You’re freaking me out!

When you don’t do anything, it hurts her feelings.  I count on you to represent me!  Don’t you get it?  I need you to perform…to inspire me.  Why don’t you work like you used to?  Why are you so lazy now?  What happened to you, Piston?

It’s like you’ve fallen and you can’t get up!  I need your attention.  No, better yet…  I need you to stand at attention!   Get up!”

If my Piston could speak, he might say:

“Are you serious?   Do you even know what a calisthenic is?  Have you ever seen a french fry you didn’t like?  Are you afraid that if you exercise, you might break out in…muscles?

Theres nothing wrong with me Papi.  You are the problem.  Let me explain to you why I don’t get all excited anymore…why I’m maxing and relaxing while you’re all freaking out and stuff.

When I feel your eyes on me…willing me to rise.  you have that look that says ‘get up!’  But all the while, your mind is telling me ‘stay down’.  It’s sending me signals saying I don’t have it anymore.  I’m too old.  I’m not big enough for the job.  I’m broken.  And, I hear your mind talking to you sometimes too.  Yeah…I hear it telling you that you are too old, tired, not good enough…  You don’t fight back.  So, I don’t fight back.  I do what you do!

The final straw was when you put that thing on…that tire on!  I remember the days that I could stand out and see you looking down at me.  Now, all I see is that tire on your hips.  You need to raise up off those pork chops and breathe, my friend.

Piston doesn’t have a problem.  Papi has the problem.  Work it out!”

About ThePureBed
Welcome and thanks for giving us a once over! Our blog celebrates and honors sexual intimacy in the context of marriage.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: