What’s Okay? The Right Sexual Mind

Sex Lives

What's right?

1I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.

2And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

 Romans 12:1-2

It’s false pride to believe we naturally know what sexual thoughts and actions are acceptable for us as disciples of Christ.  Many believers come to adopt a position that any sexual act between a man and a woman automatically is permissible as long as act does not include the physical presence of others.   At the other end of the spectrum, many of us believe that if it looks or feels ‘dirty’ it must be.  In both cases, the influence of our fallen natures and environmental influences on our views of sexuality are scarcely appreciated.

The truth of the matter is that we are all, to some degree, influenced by our environment and culture.  Not all of those influences are healthy or wholesome.  This is true when it comes to what we perceive about what constitutes acceptable sexual behavior in marriage.

We face portrayals of sex daily that don’t adhere to God’s excellent standard for our lives.  We have to be careful that we do not adapt our thinking based on those portrayals.  Creativity and pleasure can and should be aspects of our sex lives but not at the expense of compromising our testimonies in Christ. 

We may have been taught that certain acts, behaviors or strong sexual desire are somehow evil or to be avoided because they are inspired by worldliness or carnality…or lust.  The sexual attitudes by notable others in our lives have been fundamental in our understanding of how to view our sexual desires and their place in our marriages.

Often, it is not what we do as much as why we do some things that displeases God.  Trying to recreate worldly portrayals of sex is not where we should be.  An approach to sex that is strictly pleasure-based or that is only oriented toward orgasm is animalistic and conforms to an unGodly way of looking at physical intimacy.  Sexual intercourse strictly for procreation is an abandonment of the other equally important purposes of physical intimacy, physical fulfillment and relational closeness.

God cares about what we do with and to our bodies.  Sex is inherently Godly because he created it.  And as Creator, He reserves the right to regulate our sexual attitudes and practices.  This doesn’t mean that God issues a comprehensive list of sexual do’s and don’ts.  However, it does mean that marriage is not a free-pass to participate in every sexual act that pleases us. 

Our reasonable service to God demands we consider how we express our sexuality in our marriages and be certain that God is still getting the glory!  Apostle Paul exhorts us of a need to think differently (renewed) and to see our bodies as vessels yielded to Christ.   It’s a call to acknowledge that our thinking can be corrupted and cause us to misuse our bodies.  Mental and physical discipline are important for Christians.  Sin is born of undisciplined desire. (James 1:15)

When we are genuinely committed to a life of faith and continually expose our minds and hearts to God’s word, we discover renewed inspirations to act and are likely to examine our own motives.  In so doing, we glorify God in our minds and our bodies. 

Sex is as much an affair of the mind as of the body.  We must inform our choices and challenge our assumptions.  In so doing, a Christian couple can experience sexual intimacy free of guilt and marked by grace.

About ThePureBed
Welcome and thanks for giving us a once over! Our blog celebrates and honors sexual intimacy in the context of marriage.

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